New Car by Cledus T. Judd

(spoken)
Come on you no good worthless piece of foreign...
(BEEP)
Wait till I get me a royalty check
I'm gonna buy me an American made car
Piece of junk

People always shout obscenities
When I stall in their lane
They're all convinced when they see me driving this heap that I'm insane
But seat belted in
I push the gas down fearlessly
Breaks stop working then
I watch the engine overheat

I need a new car
I can't ever get far
This one breaks down on me all the time
It's got four bald tires
And it always backfires
And I'm sick of that check engine light
I need a new car

I replaced all the cables and hoses
Had grease all over my face
For a couple weekends I had parts thrown all over the place
I put it back together fast
But now it's even worse
Now my friends just laugh
Cause it only goes in reverse

I need a new car
Getting to work's hard
When you have to drive backwards all the time
I'd find a junkyard and I'd sell it for parts
But I know they won't give me a dime
I need a new car

I won't repair anymore
Now the dang transmission's about to fall out
The only thought that's on my brain is the new car
I could be driving now

Rumor is they're having a sale over at the push pull or drag car lot
If I can get this towed down there I swear I'll take anything they've got
So with a credit line of $20,000 plus
No interest or money down and no more taking the bus

I got a new car
Looking like a big star
I don't care if the price is too high
It's got a VCR cruise control and Onstar
So I know where I'm at all the time
I got a new car

He got a new car